Cum Recepticle: Hello, Doctor Saw!
Cum Recepticle: Are you into amputations?
drsaw2: what kind?
Cum Recepticle: Um....like, the kind you do with a bone saw.
Cum Recepticle: I dunno, arms, legs, you name it.
drsaw2: i'm more into putting things in. you know?
Cum Recepticle: Ooooh yeah, I know *exactly* what you mean.
drsaw2: how did you get the sn?
Cum Recepticle: I love a catheter as much as the next guy
Cum Recepticle: Umm...because people deposit their cum in me a lot.
drsaw2: what hole?
Cum Recepticle: I don't recall saying anything about a hole.
drsaw2: where do they deposit?
Cum Recepticle: The bank.
Cum Recepticle: Well, in me...
Cum Recepticle: I'm a sperm bank.
Cum Recepticle: The Western Fertility Center of Illinois, as a matter of fact.
drsaw2: what do you do with the sperm?
Cum Recepticle: My staff of trained doctors, nurses and other professionals sorts, catalogs and stores the sperm for use in artificial insemination techniques for singles and couples unable to have children of their own.
drsaw2: so why does your profile say you're 13 and like to fuck?
Cum Recepticle: I was founded 13 years ago by Dr. Karl Obstenstein, a noted professor in the field of Artificial Fertility Treatments. I'm not sure why it says I like to fuck, tho...that's not quite how it works.
drsaw2: are you making this shit up as you go along?
Cum Recepticle: What? No! I'm a noted fertility clinic - I don't make shit up.
drsaw2: oh.ok.
Cum Recepticle: So, what can I do for you?
drsaw2: well, i didn;t know you were a fertility clinic, so i don't know
Cum Recepticle: Oh.
Cum Recepticle: So, you're into cybersex, right?
drsaw2: i'm into all sex. u?
Cum Recepticle: I'm a sperm bank, for crying out loud! I don't have sex, I have maintanence checks and get power bills.
drsaw2: ok
Cum Recepticle: However, if you were interested, my staff could purchase some of your semen from you.
drsaw2: how would i get it to u?
Cum Recepticle: You'd put it in a manilla envelope and send it to us Priority Mail.
Cum Recepticle: If you don't get it here in 2-3 days it'll go bad.
drsaw2: oh ok. can you do anything to help me get it out?
Cum Recepticle: Possibly. First, I need you to remove your pants and underwear/boxers.
drsaw2: ok
Cum Recepticle: Okay, do you have a webcam or digital camera or anything? This'll be easier if I can see what you're doing.
drsaw2: no. i don't sorry
Cum Recepticle: Okay. Well, we can do this still, but it may take longer.
Cum Recepticle: Next, go get some vaseline. It'll make the next step easier.
drsaw2: ok
Cum Recepticle: That was quick. You're one sick puppy...
drsaw2: i told you. i like sex
Cum Recepticle: Right.
Cum Recepticle: Okay, here's what you're going to do -
Cum Recepticle: put vaseline on the index and middle finger of your left hand, and insert those fingers into your rectum.
Cum Recepticle: There's a spot in the upper-front quadrant of your colon that, if pressure is applied to, will cause you to have an uncontrollable orgasm.
drsaw2: but i don't do it that way
Cum Recepticle: Before you apply the pressure, be sure to have the manilla envelope placed securely over your penis, so as to collect all the semen.
Cum Recepticle: Oh, okay...how do you want to do it then?
Cum Recepticle: As long as you deposit your load into the envelope, it doesn't matter how you get it out.
drsaw2: i was looking for a young girl
Cum Recepticle: BTW, I suggest you write all the mailing information on the envelope before ejaculating into it, it's kind of difficult to write on it once it's soggy.
Cum Recepticle: Hm, could you go down to the local Red Light District and pick up a young girl? Would that work?
drsaw2: probably not
Cum Recepticle: Damn. Do you have a sister or cousin nearby?
drsaw2: no
drsaw2: i've thought of that
Cum Recepticle: Is your mother around?
drsaw2: too old
Cum Recepticle: I'm sure you have thought about that...*sighs*
Cum Recepticle: Right, well..hmm...
Cum Recepticle: I guess that answers the question of whether or not you could go to a nearby graveyard.
drsaw2: yup
Cum Recepticle: Hm. What city do you live in?
drsaw2: miami
Cum Recepticle: Go down to the Miami Zoo, I'm sure you can find a primate of your liking there.
drsaw2: where are you?
Cum Recepticle: *sighs* I'm in Baiting, west Illinois.
drsaw2: no one there that could help me?
Cum Recepticle: Oh, yes.
drsaw2: who?
Cum Recepticle: My trained staff can help you donate, no problem.
drsaw2: how do you mean?
Cum Recepticle: You'll have to come here, of course, and the nurse will have to stick her fingers into your ass, but it'll work.
drsaw2: oh ok
Cum Recepticle: Our trained professionals cannot stick their index and middle fingers into your anus from across the country. We're not Quantum Physicists or anything.
drsaw2: ok
Cum Recepticle: It'd really be easiest if you were to find some pornography on the internet, masturbate to it, and deposit your semen into the manilla envelope addressed to the Western Fertility Center of Illinois.
Cum Recepticle: (send Priority Mail, of course)
drsaw2: can you send me a pic?
Cum Recepticle: yeah, hold on a sec
drsaw2: ok
Cum Recepticle: Damn...sorry, but I'm unable to find a picture of our advanced facility, complete with photos of the labs and rest area.
Cum Recepticle: It really is beautiful in the fall.
drsaw2: oh well. guess i'll talk to you later
Cum Recepticle: Okay. Remember - mail us that semen for some quick cash!
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