janamkhan1: how r u
janamkhan1: i want to learn some thing from u
janamkhan1: would u like to teach me something about sex
SexAdviceChick: I believe I can. I need your age, sex, and location first, sir.
janamkhan1: thanks
janamkhan1: 29/m not yet married
janamkhan1: from Pakistan
SexAdviceChick: Is there something specific I can teach you, sir? Call me Abby, please.
janamkhan1: ur age pls
SexAdviceChick: I'm 13.
janamkhan1: oh, so young
janamkhan1: then how can u teach me about sex
SexAdviceChick: True. Please do not despise my age.
janamkhan1: i think u will be not aware all of these
SexAdviceChick: Much like you're not aware of my ragin' Johnson, right?
janamkhan1: about which u can give advice
janamkhan1: i mean only doing sex or medicine
janamkhan1: or style of sex
SexAdviceChick: Medicine? Like drugs? Like crack?
SexAdviceChick: Are you a crack whore?
janamkhan1: no
SexAdviceChick: Are you a stoner Deadhead hippie?
janamkhan1: i didn't understand pls explain
SexAdviceChick: Probably because you're too stoned right now. Just sit down, I'll bring you some Fritos, K?
janamkhan1: ok, dear
SexAdviceChick: Good, good.
Now just relax, I'll bring over some incense and a black light poster, and we'll both get mellow.
janamkhan1: ok, dear
janamkhan1: then
SexAdviceChick: Then we rub patchouli oil all over our bodies, steal money from our parents' trust funds to support
our drug habits, refuse to take showers, and bum change from people on the street.
janamkhan1:
janamkhan1: more
janamkhan1: u r so cute and nice
SexAdviceChick: Of course, we have to have wild, free, drugged-out sex, too.
janamkhan1: that's good
janamkhan1: how much penis have u dear
janamkhan1: i mean dick
janamkhan1: sorry to hurt u
janamkhan1: ok, carry on
SexAdviceChick: You don't need to apologize, I'll be returning the favor in a big way soon enough!
janamkhan1: thanks dear
SexAdviceChick: Well right on, dude! I wanna snort some coke before we get started though, K?
janamkhan1: ok, dear
SexAdviceChick: *snort snort* Man, that Phish show fuckin' rocked, you know? It was wicked! Like, that was
the best time I've had since Widespread came through town!
janamkhan1: ok
SexAdviceChick: So let's have sex now. Unless you want some drugs, too.
janamkhan1: ok, start
SexAdviceChick: Alright, I start off by taking off my tie-dye shirt with the Jerry Bears on it, and placing it on the
ground next to your lava lamp.
janamkhan1: ok, I have also take off my shirt,
janamkhan1: now u
SexAdviceChick: And I pull down your patched-up bell-bottom pants (although when you're not looking, I take your
quarter-ounce out of your pocket and put it in mine). Then I take off my pants, too!
janamkhan1:
janamkhan1: my penis is standing
SexAdviceChick: Yeah, same here, hombre!
janamkhan1: ok, more
SexAdviceChick: Easy, man.... I'm trying to fight off the acid and mushrooms we took earlier.
janamkhan1: ok, dear
janamkhan1: u r so sweet and nice dear
SexAdviceChick: Tell me I am far out and groovy!!
janamkhan1: i love sex dear and am fond of doing sex
SexAdviceChick: Yes, but tell me "You are far out and groovy, man. Dig it!"
janamkhan1: I have fucked many girls and boys
janamkhan1: I like buttock very much
janamkhan1: i love anal sex
SexAdviceChick: Dammit! You're trippin', man!! How many acid tabs did you take?
janamkhan1: i swear, that i am telling truth
SexAdviceChick: Holy shit... don't be wigging out on me, man... my bug's all fucked up and I can't drive you to the
hospital. And we'd get busted by the pigs, too. *shakes head* No, man.... naw...!!!
SexAdviceChick: Are you alright, dude?
janamkhan1: yeh, honey
janamkhan1: but now i take little time in fucking
janamkhan1: i take much time in making love
SexAdviceChick: Shit... you're havin' a bad trip, man. I'll turn off the Pink Floyd, okay?
janamkhan1: Pink Floyd ?
janamkhan1: what is this
janamkhan1: pls explain
SexAdviceChick: It's the "Dark Side of the Moon" CD... the one you watch "The Wizard of Oz" to. We just
fuckin' did it a week ago, man, with Mike! Remember he fuckin' passed out and puked all over your shoes?
janamkhan1: is there viagra available ? and which is its prize there
SexAdviceChick: Nah, man... I tried to hook us up, but Darrel is still pissed we broke his Cheech and Chong tape.
janamkhan1: i didn't understand, what u talking about
SexAdviceChick: Of course you don't understand, you're fucking stoned off your ass right now. Shit! Someone's at
the door! HIDE THE FUCKIN' WEED MAN!!!
SexAdviceChick: DUDE!!! IT'S THE PIGS!!!
janamkhan1: I can also fuck u dear
janamkhan1: I have big and fat penis
janamkhan1: it is so strong
SexAdviceChick: FUCKIN' COPS, MAN... SHIT!!!
SexAdviceChick: I'll take care of them, you stay right there.
janamkhan1: ok, honey
SexAdviceChick: ** Uuuuhhh... hi officer.... um. C-can I help you? **
janamkhan1: yeh, dear
SexAdviceChick: ** Are you Joel H. Morgan? **
SexAdviceChick: ** Uh, there's no one here by that name, sir! **
janamkhan1: no dear
janamkhan1: I am Abdul
janamkhan1: love sex and doing sex
SexAdviceChick: ** (Dude, shit the fuck up back there!!! Shhh!) **
janamkhan1: ok, dear
SexAdviceChick: ** It smells... funny in there... mind if I have a look around? **
janamkhan1: then dear
SexAdviceChick: ** NO, GODDAMMIT!! GO GET A FUCKING WARRANT, THEN COME BACK HERE!!!
I KNOW MY RIGHTS!!!! ***
SexAdviceChick: (I slam the door.)
SexAdviceChick: Alright, where were we?
janamkhan1: where u wish
SexAdviceChick: Alright man... Dude.... ROTFLMAO! I just answered the door in my fuckin' choners!!! Ha ha ha
hahahaha!!!!
janamkhan1: lets start fucking
SexAdviceChick: Well, alright, man!! I take off my underwear, and place it on your stoned head. I wave my hand
in front of your face. "How many fingers am I holding up?!? Hahaha!!"
janamkhan1: ok dear
SexAdviceChick: My man-tool is hanging peacefully between my legs, but it becomes rigid as you grab it and start
to stroke it.
janamkhan1: but i like buttock very much
SexAdviceChick: Mmm... I'll be Allen Ginsburg, you be Jack Kerouac, okay?
janamkhan1: i don't know both of them
janamkhan1: but like to fuck a buttock
SexAdviceChick: Dude.... I got that "psychic connection" with you right now... I KNOW what you're talking about,
man.
SexAdviceChick: And I like to fuck a buttock, too! DUDE! Isn't that fucking GREAT!!!???!!!
janamkhan1: u should use my dick
SexAdviceChick: So how about if I rub patchouli oil all over my stiff love rod, and slide it into your unbathed
ass-hole?
SexAdviceChick: Dude... you're fucking out of it, huh?
SexAdviceChick: Well, I suppose I could just rape your ass while you're lying there, half-dazed.
janamkhan1: it will be very amazing, when in inserted my penis into ur buttock and u started down and up
SexAdviceChick: It will be very amazing... I don't see how you'd have the energy to do that, if you can barely even
talk.
SexAdviceChick: Right now, though, listen carefully -
SexAdviceChick: I want you to suck on my penis, so it will get wet, then I can slide it into your asshole.
SexAdviceChick: Will you do that for me?
janamkhan1: i will insert my dick into ur mouth, it will become wet and then i insert it into ur ass hole
janamkhan1: u will enjoy it very much
SexAdviceChick: Yes, I will enjoy it, man. But you have to suck my dick first, or it's gonna hurt like a
son-of-a-bitch when I'm shoving my dick into your buttocks.
SexAdviceChick: I don't want to cause you any pain, cause that would be bad karma, dude.
janamkhan1: i think u r a habitual katamite and u will suck my penis first and then insert it into ur buttock and start up and
down.
SexAdviceChick: Okay, this has taken a turn for the worst.
janamkhan1: yeh,
SexAdviceChick: I grab the lava-lamp, and use it as a butt-plug, and I shove it into your buttocks.
janamkhan1: i think u will enjoy very much my dick into ur mouth and buttock, if u use it once, then u will say again do this
SexAdviceChick: Then I take your copy of the Koran, and jerk off all over it, getting my semen all over the pages.
janamkhan1: fuck ur mother
janamkhan1: ur sister
janamkhan1: ur wife
janamkhan1: u and ur whole family.
SexAdviceChick: "Allah! I want to fuck your tight ass!" "Mohammed, I wanna shoot my seed all over your
face!!"
SexAdviceChick: I scream wildly as my semen lands on the pages.
janamkhan1: u r a kafir
janamkhan1: u should respect quran
SexAdviceChick: Then I crumple up the pages and wipe my ass with them and rub them all over your face.
janamkhan1: I told u that u all were be destroyed once
SexAdviceChick: You should respect my COCK, bitch!
SexAdviceChick: Jesus loves you.
SexAdviceChick: Jesus died on the cross for you, will you accept Him into your heart?
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