Kyodi Tae: Thanks, mehlermarvin.
mehlermarvin: You are welcome!
mehlermarvin: what time is it in Korea?
mehlermarvin: 2:06 AM here in Kansas...
Kyodi Tae: Then subtract like eleven hours. I'm not sure.
mehlermarvin: Then the sun must be shining in early afternoon
mehlermarvin: Cool!
Kyodi Tae: Yeah, that's about right.
mehlermarvin: You look and sound older than 12!
Kyodi Tae: Ok, ok - I'm 13.
mehlermarvin: gotchaa!
Kyodi Tae: Sorry - some guys just won't do me unless I'm 12, though - so I've got to lie to get laid.
mehlermarvin: OHH!
mehlermarvin: What a shame!
Kyodi Tae: I get the feeling you're the type of guy who will love me regardless of my age, am I right?
mehlermarvin: Having any trouble getting laid lately?
Kyodi Tae: *shrug* I can't get laid by anyone with any intelligence.
mehlermarvin: does that mean people on the internet are ignorant?
mehlermarvin: (as a general category, of course)
Kyodi Tae: People on the InterNet lie about the size of their penises. It doesn't make them ignorant, just bastard liars.
mehlermarvin: not the current participants
mehlermarvin: And what sort of answers to you get, if i may ask
Kyodi Tae: Normally like, "I have a (7/8/13) inch cock."
Kyodi Tae: I hate liars.
Kyodi Tae: No one in the world has a fucking 13inch cock, and if they did, they wouldn't be looking for ass on the InterNet.
mehlermarvin: LOL
mehlermarvin: True!
mehlermarvin: You don't believe in 7 inchers?
Kyodi Tae: Well, I've seen a seven-inch penis, but too many InterNet pedophiles have them for all of them to have one.
mehlermarvin: or 18 cm, if that's more familiar to you
mehlermarvin: You're probably right.
Kyodi Tae: *shrug* Metric vs English doesn't make much difference.
Kyodi Tae: Anyway - you're 45, right?
mehlermarvin: And there is no reason for you to believe me when I tell you i am, for real, a 7 incher...
mehlermarvin: yes
mehlermarvin: it makes no difference on the net anyway
Kyodi Tae: Wow - well, if you're real, I guess I can believe that.
Kyodi Tae: Right. I could have a 45inch cock, and it really wouldn't make much difference.
mehlermarvin: there's no way we'll meet in person, so it becomes a moot point
Kyodi Tae: Nah, we could meet in person, if you really, really wanted to.
mehlermarvin: what counts on the net is conveying the sensations of the physical world to your imagination
mehlermarvin: oh right! Like I'll catch a train to Korea!
Kyodi Tae: They did invent airplanes and boats. You can always take those.
mehlermarvin: Always!?
Kyodi Tae: Always as in "there's nothing to stop from taking a plane or a boat".
mehlermarvin: Yes it would be fun and adventurous, but...
Kyodi Tae: But what?
mehlermarvin: I seriously doubt that it will ever happen.
Kyodi Tae: Aw. Now I'm all sasd.
Kyodi Tae: Er, sad.
mehlermarvin: I wondered if that would hurt your feelings...
mehlermarvin: i'm sorry, but we just met
Kyodi Tae: What if we got to know each other better?
mehlermarvin: and although it is a dangerous, exciting adventure,
mehlermarvin: i'm afraid it would be unfair of me to lead you on otherwise
Kyodi Tae: It's not like my parents would care.
mehlermarvin: What is it that you are after, Tae?
mehlermarvin: that you want...
Kyodi Tae: I want someone to love me!
mehlermarvin: is that an unfair question?
mehlermarvin: yes, we all need that!
mehlermarvin: love is a very complex, elusive thing
Kyodi Tae: Wow - you're so wise.
mehlermarvin: it was horribly unattainable when I was a teenager
mehlermarvin: i was way too shy
mehlermarvin: and lacking in social skills
Kyodi Tae: So, you weren't unattainable so much as just a big fucking dork?
mehlermarvin: no, i was little, too
Kyodi Tae: Ah.
mehlermarvin: a little fucking dork
Kyodi Tae: Puberty came late?
mehlermarvin: that too
Kyodi Tae: Oh, man - that sucks.
Kyodi Tae: Are you married now?
mehlermarvin: i have always appeared very young for my age
mehlermarvin: yes
Kyodi Tae: Where's your wife tonight?
mehlermarvin: i realized i was getting old when i stopped getting carded in bars
mehlermarvin: and when I asked a very pretty girl out for a date, and she accepted
mehlermarvin: and then called me back the next day
Kyodi Tae: Ok, that's not what I asked. Where's your wife tonight?
mehlermarvin: after she had talked to her mom
mehlermarvin: she's away
Kyodi Tae: Ah - when the pussy's away, the cat will play?
Kyodi Tae: Er, the mouse will play.
Kyodi Tae: DAMMIT!
Kyodi Tae: That could've been damn funny, too.
mehlermarvin: mmm
Kyodi Tae: Mmmm.
mehlermarvin: yes, you are quite astute!
Kyodi Tae: Did you just try to say I was a statue?
mehlermarvin: No, astute is perceptive
mehlermarvin: but perhaps someone will sculp you into a statue someday
Kyodi Tae: Ouch. Like marble, with the awls and the hammers and stuff?
mehlermarvin: The Venus de Tae
Kyodi Tae: Sounds like a helluva kinky night of foreplay.
mehlermarvin: well, carve a block of marble into your shape
mehlermarvin: oh baby!
mehlermarvin: talk about getting hammered!
Kyodi Tae: I'm hammered right now. If you were here, I'd offer you some rice wine, but you're not, and you said you wouldn't come...*sniff*...
mehlermarvin: there there... wrapping my arms around you and holding you close...
Kyodi Tae: And it begins...
mehlermarvin: it Does?!
Kyodi Tae: What?
mehlermarvin: tell me what!
mehlermarvin: if you're not too shy
Kyodi Tae: I'm not shy. Hardly.
mehlermarvin: prove it?
Kyodi Tae: Prove that I'm not shy?
mehlermarvin: sure
mehlermarvin: You are, aren't you
Kyodi Tae: Um, ... I like dicks, and tits, and pussies, and cunnilingus, and fellatio, and anal rape, and auto-erotic asphyxiation, and fisting, and prison movies, and porno, and sexual mutilation, and sexual disembowelment. Not shy enough for ya?
mehlermarvin: i stand fucking corrected!
mehlermarvin: but then that wasn
mehlermarvin: 't on you list...
Kyodi Tae: You're going to get fucking corrected alright! Now, get on your knees, slave!
mehlermarvin:
mehlermarvin:
mehlermarvin: or I might rise up in resistance!
Kyodi Tae: Ok, you and I are going to play a game.
Kyodi Tae: It's called "Prison Bitch".
mehlermarvin: we'll see. proceed....
Kyodi Tae: Ok, do you want to be player one or player two?
mehlermarvin: 1
Kyodi Tae: *grin* Good.
Kyodi Tae: Player one is the bitch.
mehlermarvin: i'm glad you approve
Kyodi Tae: (What the hell is my fixation with prison rape?)
mehlermarvin: and player 2 is?
mehlermarvin: probably some scary tv show you saw when you were a baby...
mehlermarvin: (to throw a silly answer at your fixation question)
Kyodi Tae: Hrm...
mehlermarvin: definitely Hrm...
Kyodi Tae: Well, ... lessee...I really don't have any ideas for this tonight.
mehlermarvin: ok. what other, simpler ideas do you have for tonight?
Kyodi Tae: How about this: you tell me what you're doing to me, and I'll think of something later.
mehlermarvin: i'm having intercourse with you, silly
mehlermarvin: what is a 4-letter word that means intercourse?
mehlermarvin: and ends with a k
Kyodi Tae: Gook?
Kyodi Tae: Are you calling me a gook?!
Kyodi Tae: GOD DAMN YOU FUCKING IGNORANT RACIST AMERICANS!
mehlermarvin: all gooks mean intercourse?!
mehlermarvin: nooooo
mehlermarvin: guess again
Kyodi Tae: *growl* If you were here, I'd disembowel you myself!
Kyodi Tae: Take it back, American!
mehlermarvin: hah!
mehlermarvin: wrong answer! guess again
Kyodi Tae: Wrong answer? You don't think I could kill you with my bare hands?
mehlermarvin: what is a 4-letter word for intercourse?
Kyodi Tae: Tock?
Kyodi Tae: Er, Rock?
mehlermarvin: and yes, i've no doubt we could kill each other with our bare hands
Kyodi Tae: I rock you?
mehlermarvin: if you wish
Kyodi Tae: *shrug*
mehlermarvin: but still wrong answer
Kyodi Tae: Ok, well, do something to me, will you
mehlermarvin: most people guess fuck
mehlermarvin: but the correct, polite answer
mehlermarvin: is Talk
Kyodi Tae: I see. So you're polite?
mehlermarvin: fuck Yes!
Kyodi Tae: Ok, well, I'll play "Polite Sex" with you then.
mehlermarvin: i'd even kiss you politely once in a while
mehlermarvin: as you were having polite sex with me
Kyodi Tae: I'll say please and thank you.
mehlermarvin: and ask you politely if you like the feelings aroused by our engagement
Kyodi Tae: We're engaged? Are we getting married?
mehlermarvin: "Oh, pardon me, miss Tae, do you like the way my golden poker feels as it glides into your flower petal?"
Kyodi Tae: Please, sir. Thank you.
mehlermarvin: you, miss Tae, are very sensuously welcome
mehlermarvin: and your nipples, miss Tae, stand so proud and erect
Kyodi Tae: Driving Miss Tae Crazy. It could be a new Estelle Getty movie.
mehlermarvin: as my very proper tongue dances circles around them
mehlermarvin: yeah, right
mehlermarvin: very nice pun, miss Tae
mehlermarvin: it is your mind that i am after!
Kyodi Tae: No, it isn't. You want my tight young hairless pussy.
mehlermarvin: ahhhh
mehlermarvin: you see through my thinly veiled facade!
Kyodi Tae: If it was my mind, we'd be talking about physics, history, etiquette, quantum mechanics, or something intelligent, and not pedophiliac sex.
mehlermarvin: and you want my great 7 inch cock
Kyodi Tae: No, believe me - I really don't.
Kyodi Tae: Ya know why?
mehlermarvin: not reciprocal space or fermi zones
mehlermarvin: tell me why
Kyodi Tae: I'll tell you how I feel about this in an interpretive dance.
mehlermarvin: ?
Kyodi Tae: *I lift my arms above my head and thrust my hips forward*
mehlermarvin: ok
Kyodi Tae: *I sway back and forth, occassionally falling to the floor, clutching wildly at my crotch*
mehlermarvin: hmmm
Kyodi Tae: *Rolling around, you notice my eyes bulging out as if in pain*
mehlermarvin: oh dear!
Kyodi Tae: *I stand again, holding a piece of the cloth out, creating a tent in front of my crotch*
mehlermarvin: uh huh
Kyodi Tae: *I suddenly strip my clothes off, revealing my seven-inch penis, and I begin to stroke it violently while dancing around in a circle, hopping alternately on one foot then another, like a Native American pow-wow*
mehlermarvin: oh i seee
Kyodi Tae: *You notice I'm sweating like a insulin-low diabetic.
Kyodi Tae: *
Kyodi Tae: You see what?
mehlermarvin: your dance
Kyodi Tae: Yes. Does it turn you on?
mehlermarvin: well, it is somewhat puzzling
Kyodi Tae: It's called "The Dance of Maturity and Sexuality, Discovering Manhood within Womanhood".
Kyodi Tae: It's a bizarre dance, and it took me a long time to learn.
Kyodi Tae: I could do another for you, if you want. This one is an interactive dance.
Kyodi Tae: It's called "Fuck the 45yr old pedophile up the ass with your seven-inch cock".
Kyodi Tae: Wanna give it a shot?
mehlermarvin: sounds like an odd form of culture
Kyodi Tae: Yeah, we have some fucked up shit in Korea.
Kyodi Tae: Do you want to try my second dance?
mehlermarvin: not much, if there
mehlermarvin: is a choice
Kyodi Tae: What? It's a yes or no question. Do you want me to fuck you up the ass in this interpretive dance or not?
mehlermarvin: no
Kyodi Tae: Hrm...ok. Well, how about a different dance then?
mehlermarvin: of what culture?
Kyodi Tae: I know "Make the 45yr old pedophile suck your seven-inch cock" or "Face-rape the 45yr old pedophile with your seven-inch cock". Choose one.
Kyodi Tae: Korean culture - from near Seoul.
Kyodi Tae: Hello? Which dance do you want to violated and forced by?
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