NYCockExchange: Read my info before asking me shit like that.
chrisbaz26: soz
chrisbaz26: im 19.m.uk
NYCockExchange: Cool. I guess.
chrisbaz26: so r u hot?
chrisbaz26: ??
NYCockExchange: Oh yeah. Of course I am hot.
chrisbaz26: ru feelin horny babe?
NYCockExchange: Meh, not really. You're going to have to get me in the mood. Do you think you can do that?
chrisbaz26: i dunno
chrisbaz26: wot ru wearin?
chrisbaz26: ??
NYCockExchange: I'm wearing a bunch of Abercrombie & Fitch clothes like a good little trendy American whore-child.
chrisbaz26: do u wanna play truth or dare?
NYCockExchange: Well....
chrisbaz26: ....?
NYCockExchange: ...alright.
chrisbaz26: cool
chrisbaz26: t or d?
NYCockExchange: Um. Don't call me a "tord", you bloody wanker.
chrisbaz26: truth or dare??
NYCockExchange: Um. Truth!
chrisbaz26: ru a virgin?
NYCockExchange: Yes.
chrisbaz26: ok
chrisbaz26: i pic truth
NYCockExchange: I didn't ask you yet, you limey bastard.
chrisbaz26: soz
NYCockExchange: K. Truth or dare?
chrisbaz26: truth
NYCockExchange: How big is your cock?
chrisbaz26: wen hard?
NYCockExchange: When soft, half-hard, when you have morning piss-wood, AND when you're just about to cum from jacking off.
chrisbaz26: ok soft-4inch
chrisbaz26: hard-7inch
chrisbaz26: morin-dunno
chrisbaz26: half hard-5inch
NYCockExchange: That doesn't sound right.
chrisbaz26: y?
chrisbaz26: y????
NYCockExchange: Well, you said "half hard" is 5 inches, but you ALSO said that it's 4 inches soft and 7 inches long. The difference between 4 and 7 is 3. So you take half of that difference, and apply it to the lesser number ("soft"), and you have 5.5 inches.
NYCockExchange: NOT FIVE, as you said.
chrisbaz26: its bout that
chrisbaz26: truth or dare hun
chrisbaz26: u there hunni?
NYCockExchange: Stop trying to dodge the issue, please. Even if you just wrote "5 inches" just to be lazy (and eschew the decimal), you'd have to round up, anyhow. You always round up from .5 or higher.
chrisbaz26: ok sorry
NYCockExchange: Yes, I'm here. And I'm pissed. I asked you for the "truth", and you responded with a half-truth. I hope you will be more honest in the future, or I will have to put an end to this little game.
chrisbaz26: ok sorry
chrisbaz26: truth or dare
NYCockExchange: It's okay, you don't need to apologize - you can make up for it by offering me crumpets and tea later.
NYCockExchange: Hrmm. Truth.
chrisbaz26: have u ever given out bj's?if so, wots the oldest guy
NYCockExchange: Yes, I've given out one blowjob. I don't know the guy's age, I was just trying to catch up with one of my friends.
chrisbaz26: ok cool
NYCockExchange: My friend Becca told me that she sucked some guy's cock at school, and bragged that she gave head before I did. So I was like, "Fuck you, you stupid bitch! I can give head, too!!" So I went to the retirement home near my house and I sucked off one of the old men there.
chrisbaz26: really??
NYCockExchange: Yeah. ...But I have a question: Does it count if they guy doesn't cum? Is it still a blowjob?
chrisbaz26: no
chrisbaz26: ok i pic truth
NYCockExchange: Well, fuck. I guess I've never given a blowjob, because he never came.
chrisbaz26: right
NYCockExchange: I didn't ask yet, fucker. Quit being rude and barging in during the middle of my story! I thought you European people were supposed to be civilized and polite!!
chrisbaz26: ok sorry
NYCockExchange: Anyway, yeah, he never came. About like 3 minutes after I started sucking his dick, he started moaning really loud, then grabbing his left armpit. I thought that just meant that he was really getting off, but no. As I found out later, he was going into cardiac arrest, and he died right there while I was sucking his cock.
chrisbaz26: right
chrisbaz26: ru sure?
NYCockExchange: I tried to make him cum by sucking him off for like two hours, but he just laid there. Then his dick started getting cold, and I told him so. But he didn't answer, because he was dead, you know?
chrisbaz26: do u haave a pic?
NYCockExchange. chrisbaz26 is now directly connected.
NYCockExchange:
chrisbaz26: ur nice
chrisbaz26: got ne more
NYCockExchange: Thanks.
But no more pics right now; we were in the middle of a Truth or Dare game,
remember?chrisbaz26: ok
chrisbaz26: ask me then
NYCockExchange: Okay. Truth or Dare?
chrisbaz26: dare
NYCockExchange: Are you sure? You said "truth" a little while ago, before I asked you this time....
chrisbaz26: no i want dare
NYCockExchange: Okay. I dare you to get completely naked!
chrisbaz26: ok hang on
NYCockExchange: Okay, I'm waiting.
chrisbaz26: dun
NYCockExchange: No hurries, though. I'll just sit here and think about what a farce the E.U. is... or something.
NYCockExchange: Goddamn, that didn't take long. Were you only wearing a loincloth, or what?
chrisbaz26: no, jus my boxers and a top
NYCockExchange: Really? Like... whoa. That's all I'm wearing. Anyway, there you go. Ask away.
chrisbaz26: truth or dare
NYCockExchange: Dare!!
chrisbaz26: i dare u 2 send me anouther pic
NYCockExchange: Well, alright....
NYCockExchange:
chrisbaz26: ne more?
chrisbaz26: do u have a nude?
chrisbaz26: ??
NYCockExchange: Yeah, I have more pictures. But it's your fault for not saying, "I dare you to send me 5 more pics! And a nude!" ...You only asked for "anouther pic", so that's all you got. Sorry.
chrisbaz26: ok
chrisbaz26: but do u haves nudes?
NYCockExchange: That's a "truth" question. Get back to me on that one when it's your turn again. Right now, I believe it is my turn. So ask.
chrisbaz26: truth or dare
NYCockExchange: Dare!!
chrisbaz26: i dare u 2 send me 2 pictures and a nude picture!
NYCockExchange: I meant "truth". Sorry.
chrisbaz26: wot is ur bra size?
chrisbaz26: ??
NYCockExchange: Errr, wait a second. We completely fucked up the order, here. You asked me "truth or dare", and I said "dare", and you dared me to send you another pic. Then you asked me "truth or dare" AGAIN, before I got to ask you.
chrisbaz26: ok ask me
NYCockExchange: You're not playing fair, you David Hasselhoff-loving butt-leech.
NYCockExchange: Okay - truth or dare?
chrisbaz26: truth
NYCockExchange: Truth? Okay....
chrisbaz26: yeh
NYCockExchange: Are you willing to sit there and wait for 4 minutes while I go out and have a cigarette?
chrisbaz26: no
NYCockExchange: Well, too bad. BRB.
chrisbaz26: ok hunni
NYCockExchange: Okay, I'm back. I said 4 minutes - how long did I take?
chrisbaz26: dunno
chrisbaz26: so then, will u send me ur pix?
NYCockExchange: chrisbaz26 (2:31:48 PM): ok hunni
NYCockExchange (2:39:43 PM): Okay, I'm back. I said 4 minutes - how long did I take?
....Looks like I took 8 minutes. Wow. And you were sitting in front of the computer naked, the whole time?
chrisbaz26: yeh!!
chrisbaz26: wil u send em me?
NYCockExchange: *ahem*
chrisbaz26: ??
NYCockExchange: You're a gentleman and a scholar for waiting naked in front of the computer for 8 minutes, but you need to ask "truth or dare".
chrisbaz26: truth or dare?
NYCockExchange: Truth.
chrisbaz26: wot makes u horny?
chrisbaz26: plz will u send me ur pics?? i have 2 go in a minute!!!
NYCockExchange: You want a list of all of the things that get me horny? Or do you want to know what makes me the MOST horny?
chrisbaz26: most horny
chrisbaz26: well then?
NYCockExchange: Well, it REALLY gets me hot when I have cybersex with sexy, illiterate European men, of course. I like the way that they look at my nubile young body as a means to escape the "inferior to the U.S. in every way" rut that they're living in. It's like they need me, and that makes me feel good about myself and it gets my pussy wet.
chrisbaz26: ok
chrisbaz26: ask me
NYCockExchange: Okay.
Truth or dare?chrisbaz26: truth
NYCockExchange: K. Were you jacking off to the pictures while I was out smoking?
chrisbaz26: abit
chrisbaz26: truth or dare
NYCockExchange: abit = "a bit"? Did you cum?
chrisbaz26: no
chrisbaz26: i g2g
chrisbaz26: i will b bk in a min
NYCockExchange: In a minute? Um. Okay.
chrisbaz26 direct connection is closed.
NYCockExchange: So, anyway, I was sucking that old man off for like two hours, and his dick started getting cold. And he hadn't moved in what seemed like ages. And I was like, "Holy shit, does it take every guy this long to cum?" Because my neck and mouth were getting really fucking tired, you know? So I took my mouth off of his dick, and I was like, "Hey, you stupid geriatric WWI veteran... you need to cum, so I can tell my friend that I gave a blowjob, too! Are you going to cum? Hello??" But he didn't move or anything, he just sat there with this look of extreme pain frozen on his face. It was at about that time that I realized that he'd died, or something. I made sure of it by punching him in the face repeatedly, and pissing on his feet.
Previous message was not received by chrisbaz26 because of error: User chrisbaz26 is not available.
chrisbaz26: hi!
chrisbaz26: wil;l u send me ur pic yet?
chrisbaz26: ru there hunni??
NYCockExchange: Hi!
chrisbaz26: wil u send me ur nude pic?
NYCockExchange: Hold up a second. Gotta piss.
chrisbaz26: ok
NYCockExchange: Alright. I'm back.
chrisbaz26: ???
chrisbaz26: wil u send it me?
NYCockExchange: That's a "truth or dare" question.....
chrisbaz26: .........
chrisbaz26: truth or dare then
NYCockExchange: Truth!
chrisbaz26: wen will u send me ur pics?
NYCockExchange: I'll send them to you when you dare me to send them to you.
chrisbaz26: pic a dare then next time
chrisbaz26: ask me
NYCockExchange: Um. That kind of defeats the purpose. Otherwise, this game would just be called "Dare or Dare". And it doesn't work that way.
chrisbaz26: ok
chrisbaz26: ask me
NYCockExchange: Okay. Truth or dare?
chrisbaz26: dare
chrisbaz26: DARE
NYCockExchange: Alright. I dare you to grab a big, heaping handful of mayonnaise and rub it all over your penis and ass-crack.
chrisbaz26: right
NYCockExchange: Well, are you going to do that, or what?
chrisbaz26: i am
chrisbaz26: truth or dare
NYCockExchange: Did you do it yet?
chrisbaz26: i have
chrisbaz26: truth or dare?
NYCockExchange: Fuck you. You didn't spread the mayo all over your groin. Do you think I'm stupid? It takes longer than that. How dare you disrespect me!!!
chrisbaz26: i put it on my knob and legs
chrisbaz26: honest
NYCockExchange:
I'll bet you don't even have a cam to take pictures of it with, do you?chrisbaz26: no
chrisbaz26: truth or dare?
NYCockExchange: Truth.
chrisbaz26: wot ru wearin?
NYCockExchange: I'm wearing boxers and a top.
Funny thing is, I already told you this earlier!!! NYCockExchange: Hahahaha, you wasted your turn. Hahahaha. Man, you suck!
chrisbaz26: oh
chrisbaz26: soz
NYCockExchange: Don't apologize to me. Apologize to your parents for being such a wasteful burden.
chrisbaz26: ok
NYCockExchange: Awesome. What did they say in response?
chrisbaz26: nothin
chrisbaz26: ask me hun
NYCockExchange: They didn't say anything? I guess that's okay, that means they've learned to ignore you already.
NYCockExchange: Okay. Truth or dare?
chrisbaz26: yeh
chrisbaz26: dare
NYCockExchange: I dare you to give me your name, address, and telephone number.
I'm going to
Europe with my mom and dad later this year, and I wanna hook up! chrisbaz26: ok if ur really goin
NYCockExchange: Of course! We're going to England and Germany and Holland!
chrisbaz26: ok
chrisbaz26: my name is stephen green
NYCockExchange: Is it okay to call you, Stephen?
chrisbaz26: corse
NYCockExchange: Okay. You have to give me your address and phone number, too, though.
chrisbaz26: my adresse is 456 luton road, bermondsey, london
chrisbaz26: my number is 04332 650711
chrisbaz26: truth or dare
NYCockExchange: Truth!
chrisbaz26: pic a dare
chrisbaz26: ur gonna keep pickin truth
NYCockExchange: NO. This is not "Dare or dare".
chrisbaz26: u aint got no photos av u?
NYCockExchange: I have photos. Yes, I do.
chrisbaz26: send me 1
NYCockExchange: I will, on a dare.
chrisbaz26: u wont pic dare
NYCockExchange: Well, if you want to play "Dare or dare", then you should have said so.
chrisbaz26: do u wanna play dare or dare?
NYCockExchange: Is this a "truth" question?
chrisbaz26: no
chrisbaz26: its a normal question
chrisbaz26: do u?
NYCockExchange: Well, then, ask me a "truth" question. I chose "truth", so get on with it, fucker.
NYCockExchange: ...
NYCockExchange: Okay, I see how it is. You're going to be a spoiled, rotten little baby about this. I thought you European men had dignity, patience, and class. But... YOU. You're just running away because you can't get what you want. We never should have intervened when Hitler bombed the fuck out of you people.
Previous message was not received by chrisbaz26 because of error: User chrisbaz26 is not available.
NYCockExchange: Fuckin' Europedos.
Previous message was not received by chrisbaz26 because of error: User chrisbaz26 is not available.
For more intellectually advanced logs by NYCockExchange, click here